I'm Garbage

I wanna write again. Too bad. 

An old man called me 'Garbage' when I yelled 'Fuck You' to Victor. 

It just hurts inside everytime I see him it's like. Hey I don't wanna be jealous, but you HURT me inside. But you don't even know it and don't care. Asshole. 

I feel really detached from Kenny. I miss him. A Lot. Like. A Lot a lot. ): -sigh- 

I wish he would be there again. My Comfort. Like before. Too bad though. 

----------

Whenever I talk to Brian. All I see, is a horrible person that I've created. 

The tone in his typing, I can feel it. And I feel so ashamed. So fucking tired.

That I ruined his life. Thats why I WANTED to see him with a happier mood. 

But you can't have everything you want in life and things just don't work out. So I'm giving up. 

I just hated always talking to him. Knowing. That I killed him inside. That I ruined him. I just want him. To find someone new and forget about me. Then maybe he'll find happiness, and forget about me. Cause I know. That he needs to. And I really wish that it will come true. Because he didn't deserve to be hurt so bad. All I want for Brian is for him to be happy. Unfotunately I can't make him happy. So I say. 

Screw It. 

-----------------

The sadness darkens but there are no tears whatsoever. The heart pounds and aches but no attack. The brain pulses and hurts but there is no death. I wish for comfort.

Knowing that there will be none by my side. 

As I break apart slowly, but keeping the pieces together so I will not shatter. Standing Strong. 

As Long as I can.