These. Are the last Fucking tears I'll EVER cry for him again. I give up.
I should never trust anyone again. Never.
When you are happy. You have nothing to say. When you have something bad to say. Everything pours out. Like. Once the first tear drops. Hundred more appear and you can't seem to stop. You make the first cut you rash out in rage and make more and more. Till. It all stops. Then what. Nothing.
He was the worst mistake of my life. But. If he did not hurt me. I would be oblivious. Stupid. So I thank him. But Still. I can't forget. And I desperately want to.
I do not feel depressed. But. Certain times, certain days. I think through everything. I can feel the tears come without effort. But the tears don't hurt me like they used to. I wonder why.
I want. I need. I feel. I touch. Such Greed. Such Jealously. Such is the way I think. And I think. It's awful.
I also wonder. Why do people necessarily want to live. If you died the next day, sure people would care, but they would forget. They would move on of course. Sure there are tears. But who says that Life is wonderful. Who ever said people NEED to live. Life is just another choice. Another thing to say. So.
Do everything you would never do. Take life in the moment. Because we all die right? It's what I think. It's what I believe. And It's why. I'm greedy.
I want to Love.
I want to be Happy.
I want to Drink.
I want Sex.
I want. To Live.
1 comment:
greed tends to lower your karma and it will come back to F*** you in the ass (figuratively). hell, everything is forgotten, but we live to make a difference and leaver our mark on the world. life is wonderful, but to enjoy the happiness you have to have some sadness otherwise it would be meaningless to enjoy an be happy. though we may die, its part of a cycle, and in the laws of conservation of energy nothing is gained and nothing is lost. at some point we all must move on, dwelling on the past is a waste to continue to want what could have been. of course people would move on after you die, its not like theres anyhting else they can do. once you're dead, you're gone forever. but you live on as memories of those close to you, and in the stories they tell.
oh and ScaRyxStaLkeRz ftw
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