He lied to me. He doesn't answer. 

He has time for others, just not for me. So then what. He wants nothing to do with me? Should I give up. All our memories together. Were they all lies? Every single one? All the times we laughed together. All the times I cried. 

WAS IT ALL JUST A WASTE. Just a waste of time.. 

I mean nothing to him.. Nothing at all. How could I fool myself. 

All I wanted was for him to care. Because I always thought that i meant SOMETHING. 

But I guess I was wrong. How could I have been so STUPID. 

I thought he wouldn't leave but, he has. So what now. I got nothing to hold onto. 

I might be hospitalized. Maybe this Flu should kill me. Because there really isn't anything left. 

I'd like it, if I died. It may be selfish but, I can't take anymore crap. I'm at a loss. 

I LOVED HIM. HOW COULD I BE SO STUPID. HOW COULD I FALL FOR IT. I'm just a stupid idiot.. Nothing important anymore.. No one to comfort me, and the one person that did, just left me. So now what huh?! Now what. What.. is left. 

I mean come on. I had sex with the guy, wouldn't it count for something?! 

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He was the one person i could run crying to..